Amora.

I sit on the sofa in my most comfortable clothes. I need to change into my worst clothes before Rocco comes. It's a life routine. Every time he goes to the casino to win, he returns with nothing but lost money, blaming me because I am bad luck in his life. He beats me with anything he would like.

I am his punching bag.
Bored, I am here, and he would come slap me, kick me, and leave.

Fucks me whenever he wants, I am his wife for the outfit, but I am nothing. In his life. The only reason I am still alive and not dead would be him. Mr. Antoniano. Lex antoniano. I liked him the moment I saw him with one of my friends, it was a friend's birthday.

Laughing with his friends in his perfectly fitted suit, showing his beautiful body, his voice sending sweet shivers down my spine, making my core wet and making me crave his attention. Wanting to talk to him. I was 17 at that time, not realising that my small crush would turn into love.

A love I never confessed, never told anyone, because he never saw me. He doesn't know me. There are millions of people around him, and for him to look at me in front of all those people is impossible. I am not special.

It's not something he would love or like. I never caught his eye or ever talked to him. Always look at him, hiding. Hiding from him. I am to blame, not him when he fell in love with Layla.

Announcing in front of everyone, I remember my heart breaking into pieces, the glass in my hand almost breaking, my body cold, and my heart. Stopped beating.

I am happy for him, and I never got my love, but he did. He holds power to protect his love, his Layla. And that's what I love about him. He is not like other men in the mafia, he is fun, he is sweet, he is handsome, he is a normal person and rough, hard, strong, cruel, and brutal when he needs to be.

I never thought he and Layla would break up, and I never thought Layla would be one of the outfit's enemy daughters, trying to use him as a tool to kill the capo. Dante. I saw him break in front of my eyes. His eyes filled with tears, and he was on his knees, because of which he tried more cold and more cruel.

I wipe my eyes, tears trying to come out, every time I think about him, I always cry, people imagine their lives with their crushes. I can't even do that. The day I turned 21, Dad made me marry Rocco, I didn't say no because I wouldn't marry Mr Antoniano. So, why say no? Why hurt my dad?

Maybe I should have, then I wouldn't have to endure this. This pain, these belts, these whips, burning candles, knives, slaps, words. I wouldn't need to cover my body and face in foundation, smile in front of everyone, my family, the outfit, or make up stories of a beautiful life.

A beautiful life in which I scream every day, every day, a new bruise forms. The only worthwhile thing is my family, and every time we go to those parties, I get to see Mr Antoniano, seeing him gives me peace. A small power to endure this one more day until death finds me.

I look at the clock, 12. Rocco is going to be here at any minute. I get up to change; my legs almost give up, and the pain of his belts on my leg, I am still feeling it. I take hold of the sofa, take its support, and get up.

I need to change; if he comes, he will ruin the clothes that give me warmth and comfort after his beatings.

The door flung open, and Rocco stormed into the room. Ohh, god, he is angry, every time he is angry, he beats me till morning, using all his tools, my hands start shaking at the thought I don't have the power to handle his beating today.

He beat me yesterday, fucking me, leaving me to die, but god did not take mercy on me and made me wake up today with nothing but pain.

He is going to tear my clothes; I can't let him, this is the only pair that makes me remember my dad's hug. What should I do? My eyes filled with tears in fear, my jaw shaking at what was going to happen, even after 5 years of this, I can't predict what he is going to do when he is this angry.

He makes his way to me, his eyes filled with rage, making me take a step. Make, no, I should not have done that. He hates it. I am dying today. I am. I fist my hand. And his hand meets my cheek, slapping me. It was so hard, making me lose my balance and falling on the fall, my cheek paining so much. My legs hit the floor hard, making me cry out.

He grabs my hair, making me look at him, "bitch, you are so fucking unlucky. I should have never married you, I would be better. Fucking whore." he pulls my hair, making me cry, he is pulling it so hard, I try to move his hand from my hand, but fail.

"Please, please. It's paining a lot," I beg him, my hair is going to come out if he continues to pull. He cups my jaw in a hard grip. His nails dug into my skin. There is blood on my cheek that he hit because he wears so many rings.

He opens his mouth to say something, and before he can, someone pulls him and slaps him across his face, making him fall his lip bleeding. I look at him, shocked.

"next time you touch what is mine, you will be ten inches in the ground", a dark, hard, angry voice rings in the room.

Making me freeze, my heartbeat increasing. I don't need to look up to know who it is. I know. My body knows. My mind knows. My heart knows.

Lex Antoniano.